Thursday, 19 May 2016

Memory


I fear for you to disappear 
I fear for you to fade
That memory is fading 

Where is it?
When was it?
What did i do?

The puzzles didn't fit
Some of it wasn't on the table
It wasn't in my memory
Not that I could remember
I remembered it being there
On the table
But the next thing I knew
It disappeared

Did I place it somewhere else?
Or did i threw the puzzle away
Something was missing
Something is missing 

My memory of the puzzles disappeared
Together with other memories

I'm in confusion 
In tear 

Where are you?
Memory
Where are you? 

Monday, 25 April 2016

Aku Manusia Angkuh

Angkuh itu milik Mu 

Hidup manusia seperti ombak
Yang kadang aku diatas
Yang kadang aku di bawah
Yang kadang imanku mantap
Yang kadang imanku rapuh

Dan
Yang ku mahu hanya satu
Untuk sentiasa terus naik

Ku faham rasanya
Bila dibawah
Mahu keatas
Jalannya lurus keatas
Tapi mengapa sukar
Untukku keatas

Apa kerna aku
Tidak mahu menaiki
kapal ulama'
TIdak mahu terbang bersama
sahabat penasihat
Tidak mahu panjat menaiki
tangga ketekalan

Atau hanya kerna
Aku angkuh?

Harus ku tahu 
Aku manusia 
Bukan malaikat

Terasa nadi ini mahu ku siat
Tiada lagi yang kumiliki di dunia ini selain
Keangkuhan

Monday, 18 January 2016

또 울고

Again
My heart ache

My heart ache again
Even if good things happens
Even when it's bright 
Even if you're here

Again 
My heart ache
Now that good things happen
Am I going to cry?
Now that you are here
Am I going to fear?
Now that you are here
Am I going to lose you again?

Again 
My heart ache
I'm afraid of leaving you 
Now that you are here
Do I have to leave?
Now that you are here
Do I have to turn back
Now that you are here
Why are you here?

Again
My heart ache 
Why now?
Now that I'm leaving
Do you really have to come?
Now that I'm leaving
Do you really have to beg?
Now that I'm leaving
Do you have to make me cry more?

Again
My heart ache
Not that this pain is killing
Not that I have to leave
Not that I can't see you anymore
Not that I have to say goodbye
My heart ache 
Now that you are crying

I shouldn't have accepted you 
Knowing that I'm leaving you
...crying 

Friday, 9 October 2015

yakinlah pada Dia

'Ini aku' by dahuq95
Aku sedang berlari
jauh dari semua kenyataan hati
Bukan kerna aku bodoh
bukan juga kerna aku takut
tidak pula kerna aku tidak mahu
dilukai.

Memang benar
ada yang berkata bahwa
dia harus kau cari
cinta harus kau putik
ya.

Namun tidak pernah aku terfikir
untuk mencoba
Detik hati itu pernah
berkata mahu,
Aku dahaga.

Namun azam tidak pernah ada
Detik hati itu hilang,
detik yang lain hadir
menyadarkan aku
dari lalinya tidur
membuka mata minda
yang tadinya lalai.
'Terima kasih Tuhan'

'Apa kau tidak takut
jika nanti kau keseorangan?
Tiada yang meneman
tiada yang disamping'
Pernah
ya, aku dulunya takut
rasa ketinggalan.

Apa yang akan kau peroleh
apabila sang tercinta mendusta
sesudah kau berikan segala
senyuman menawan
kata cinta
ciuman mesra dan
sentuhan?

Apa akan kau peroleh
apabila separuh darimu telah
dibawa pergi
Telah kau hilang lagi dirimu
Tiada lagi yang pertama
kerna segala yang pertama
telah dicuri
telah dibawa pergi

Bukan aku takut
atau bodoh
aku cuma enggan ada
memori itu.
Memori yang kelak
pasti akan kukesali

Harus selalu kau dan aku ingat,
Dia sempurna
tidak pernah gagal dalam kiraanNya
Ikan di lautan luas,
cacing di dalam kegelapan tanah
masih bisa.
Masakan aku yang berdiri di sini
di bumi ini
terlepas dek pandangan

Meski kau coba mengenali
hitam putih manusia itu
tidak akan berjaya kau lihat warnanya
kerna yang dipamerkan hanyalah
yang terindah
hanyalah yang kau liurkan

"Tidak perlu kau baziri 
masa mudamu mengejar
penipuan yang coba kau yakini,
kejujuran yang akan kau sangsi,
kerna ku pasti Dia telah menentukan 
yang terbaik buat mu. 
Yakinlah pada Dia."

Wednesday, 30 September 2015

you're my best.

'Sunrise Medan 2015' by dahuq95


















I'm always scared of getting broken
Getting hurt or crushed by someone
By others
And whenever I'm scared or broken
I would always run to you
Cry to you
Complaint and sometimes nag to you.

Around you
It felt real
I was me
I didn't have to neither act
Nor be someone else
You made me be myself
It's never unusual for me to be around u

To cry to you
To share my heart broken love stories
To share about my admired Prince Charming
That is yet no where to be found.

Now that you're not around
I realise how precious you were to me.
How I actually took you for granted
How I only take you in when I was in need
But never had I share with you the times
when I'm delighted, happy or in cloud 9.

In the times when I was insecure
You made me a queen of all beauty
In the times when I had fright
You made me a poet with all confidence
In the times when I was blanked with all the problems
You made me a councillor with all intelligence
In the times when I'm lost
You guide me to Him.

Truely
You are my very best
Love you and will always do.
May all these days we spent be remembered.

Sunday, 27 September 2015

D E J A V U


Pernah kau merasa deja vu?
Seakan kau mengulang perkara lalu
Seakan pernah kau merasa pilu itu
Pilu yang menghantui kau setelah kegembiraan
dan kemanisan dusta ini pergi
Kepiluan yang akan menghantuimu

Hidungmu yang tinggi melangit
Bersubangkan kemegahan
Kebanggaanmu meragakan kemewahan
Melambai kebenaran
Menghiasi matamu dengan celak kedusta
Memicakan diri dengan dendangan kekufuran
dan merangkuli kezaliman
yang kau pasti kekhilafannya

Mengapa masih kau menyasar?
Sedang kau tahu akan wujudnya
kesahihan yang menyuluh pasti
Sedang kau tahu perit dan pilu
yang bakal menusukmu
Gobar hati yang meronta menyesali
kezaliman yang kau hiasi
dengan kemanisan dunia

Namun ingatlah,
tiada keindahan yang lebih manis
dari kemanisan nertaubat.
Meski kau pasti kezaliman itu akan menjadi deja vu.
Sungguh tiada yang kau gerunkan selain
dari mati sebelumkau sempat bertaubat.

"Jika kamu bertaubat sehingga taubat itu gugur dan kamu kembali melakukan dosa, 
maka, bersegeralah bertaubat kembali! Katakanlah pada dirimu:
"Moga-moga aku mati sebelum sempat mengulangi dosa kali ini..."
-Imam Al Ghazali-

26 YEARS

"After 4 years, it is painful for me."
She said that with with a smile. 
Her white cheek turned red. 
"But it's thousand time bearable than the 26 years of hers"
Tears fell from her warm cheek.

'Yes' it should be painful. It is.'
I could say no word. 
No word of comfort. 
My hands moved and rubbed her shoulder hoping that I could comfort her.

"But at least she have all of you."
That hit me like a bullet.
'Will my presence make any difference?'
'Could I wipe away all her tears?'
'Brighten her dark night?'
'Put a smile on her face on these very tearful days?'
'And probably lessen her burden?'
All these questions struck me.

Did I do enough for her?




Saturday, 15 August 2015

kearah cahaya itu

"Destination" by dahuq95

Sampai kapan harus aku menanti
sesuatu yang jauh
dan makin menjauh
angan angan yang tiada rasionalnya
tidak kelihatan nyatanya pada mata hati
jauh sekali pada mata kasar

Terlalu jauh telah ku pergi
cahaya itu tidak lagi dapat aku lihat
kerna pelarian ini terlalu lama
menjauh dari fitrah jiwa ini

Bukan mauku untuk menjadi pelarian
namun jiwa pemberontak ini
tidak dapat aku hambakan
pemberontakan yang tiada henti itu
terlalu liat

Bila akan ku mula berjalan
kehadapan
kearah rasionalisme
juga taakulan
kenyataan yang semua tahu
kepastian yang menanti 
bukan hanya angan angan musim panas
fatamorgana yang memberi harapan hampa
namun ini adalah 
cinta Dia yang tiada baginya erti kepiluan
kerna yang ada hanya kemanisan 
yang membawa ketenangan jiwa
serta sentuhan yang memberi 
seribu senyuman dikala duka 
tawa tika senangku

Cahaya itu akan tetap di situ 
sungguhpun nanti matahari terbit dari barat
bintang yang datang menerpa
dan dihancur segala gunung serta cakerawala


Kerna Engkau 
hanya Engkau yang kekal
tika semuanya telah tiada

Sunday, 5 October 2014

identity

'tears of a soften heart' by dahuq95

Now
I just wanna close my eye
Forgetting about this world for a second
Just for a second
To forget the past
And also the future that is hunting me
Pulling me down.

Just let me close my eyes
Let my mind go free
Let this so-called identity fade
Leave me alone with amnesia
Let it do its job
Cause I can't think no more
.
My identity is my cloth
My past define me
My future saves me
Just if
If I take off my old cloth 
And put on a new identity
Brush off my past 
Drawing out a new future..
Will you treat me better?
Will he be okay?

Monday, 29 September 2014

I'll be yours. :)

Friends. Just the word itself is tempting. I want to make more of them. I want the whole world to be mine. My friend. We may not be of the same color but it doesn't matter 'cause 'Hi' is all that it take to start one

.
     My legs keep walking. Walk all over this land of His. Dancing and twirling around to find you. Another friend of mine. Wishing you are walking too. Wishing we will meet on our way to the paradise of His.

     Smile is my clothe, my accessories now. It was always his too. I hope my smile will make your day as his had made others. How his smile melts the hard rock hearts, cleared the path, brighten the dark, moisten the dry eyes. How his smile change the heart of the haters. Your smile spoke for thousand words. Just your smile was enough, so beautiful that no word was able to describe its beauty.


     My arms are open wide for you. Hoping that they will give you the warmth that you needed. The comfort you're finding for.
   
     There's one thing that I learnt out of friends, out of making more friends.
They say one good friend is enough but for me, friends are never enough. Seeing new faces is what making me who I am. It is what learning is all about. The differences are what completing us. Making us One.

Thanks for being one of mine. :)